The Anti-Bucket List

We all have the list of things that we want to accomplish in life. But, after reading this delightful blog post I was inspired to compile my very own anti-bucket list. Items on your anti-bucket list are the things that you have no desire to ever do, or ever do again. So here’s mine. I don’t care if I never:

1. Go Skydiving – No, I’ll stay inside this perfectly operational aircraft thankyouverymuch.

2. Get a Tattoo – I’m sure there are more than a few regrettable tramp stamps out there. Count me out.

3. Bungee Jump – Anything that increases the cost of your life insurance is generally not a good idea in my book.

4. Have a Natural Childbirth – Modern medicine was invented for a reason, so stop eating your own placenta for two minutes and give me my epidural.

5. Make a Lot of Money – I’d rather be poor and happy than overworked and unavailable to my kids.

6. Watch the Original "Star Wars" Movies – I think some people are actually offended that I have never seen any of them in their entirety. They look at me like I said their baby is ugly or something.

7. Have the Cleanest House – I’m pretty sure I’ll never be on my death bed and think to myself, I wish I would have spent more time cleaning my house. I’m very good at reminding myself of this every day.

8. Like Wine or Coffee – I’ve tried and they both taste like crap to me. I’m convinced that people that say they like either one are lying to themselves to seem cooler than you.

9. Get Another Pedicure – I’ve only had three and they were all miserable experiences. Does anyone actually enjoy these? I guess it doesn’t help that I have a freak toe that I hate having touched. Her name is "Big."

10. Wear Gladiator Sandals – My legs are short enough, I don’t need to truncate them more by donning a bulky sandal that goes half way up my calf. Not even celebrities look good in these. Call me old, I guess.

Here is another anti-bucket list that I enjoyed. What’s on your anti-bucket list?